Breaking up with my long-term partner is a damp squib. We broke up last week and I didn't even shed a single tear. And right now, I am already on the search for someone who can replace him. Are there any volunteers here?

Lost in love for a while. I'd been in a relationship with the wrong f*cking guy as Jennifer Lopez once said. I'm not ashamed to tell you that I was hurt, but that's a lesson learned. I'm stronger now, and I'm ready to do anything. Any suggestions for...

I want to escape the real world, and go to a different world where flirting and having sex is not seen as immoral. I'd be chuffed if a bloke can lick my arse any time or if he can drink from my strawberry creams.

I drool if I see a fine man's bollocks. The next thing that I do, I lick those bollocks like a hungry hot beast. It's lovely to hear a guy groan out of pleasure. Hearing a guy moan makes me soaking wet.

My crush is Tom Brady. He's real, and he seems to be wild in bed. I can see that through my eyes. But I know I can't have sex with the real Brady, so I'm looking for someone like him in any way who can make something moist.

I've been on best dates, and that means I've also been on worst dates which I'm not afraid to admit. They're all fun but, right now, I'm not yet ready to date another bloke. I'm looking for someone who's fine with chatting with me until I'm ready. If...