Whenever a lad hits up on me and asks me where I came from, I always tell them I came from a floating island in Gulliver's Travels. They laugh. Those little bastards don't know it's Laputa. Guess I'll have to change my address, whaddya think?

Many men are enchanted my by mesmerising eyes. I can hear them gasp as I pass by the street or when riding the tube. I can't blame them, can't I? But, I'm not the typical lass who shags with anyone without the getting to know part.

Working all day takes off all the hours I could have for myself. All I can do is beat the bean on lonely nights. All I want is someone to chat with who could get me through these nights. If you think you can keep me company, hit me up!

I drool if I see a fine man's bollocks. The next thing that I do, I lick those bollocks like a hungry hot beast. It's lovely to hear a guy groan out of pleasure. Hearing a guy moan makes me soaking wet.

It blows me away looking at someone wanking. I could feel that there's this force pushing me and telling me to suck this bloke's penis like a slag. It feels so good sucking his penis down my throat and taking every liquid as he moans.

I've been on best dates, and that means I've also been on worst dates which I'm not afraid to admit. They're all fun but, right now, I'm not yet ready to date another bloke. I'm looking for someone who's fine with chatting with me until I'm ready. If...